I'm Beginning To Think I Have A Serious Mental Condition

such as bipolar.
seriously how does one person have so many mood swings. one day im like, oh yay im so happy and the next im like, fuck the world. fuuuccckkk thhhee wooorrrlllddd.
seriously. why dont boys like me?

ALL BOYS ARE JERKS!

the name is self explanitory.

You Know What?

The good thing about me liking this new boy is that im completely over the douchbag one!
:)

Dear Boy

Dear Boy That Has Caught My Attention,
This is what is making me interested in you right now:

• that time last year that you pretended to be my boyfriend when those 2 guys were trying to force me to go home with them.
  its one of my favourite moments of my entire life. i actually could have married you right there and then for that.
  for the readers out there (luke) let me tell you the story! because i like it...
  so im out at the whitebull and these 2 guys wont leave me alone, following me everywhere, saying the know me because im "Bennies Little Sister" and my name is "michelle" (what the fuck? atleast learn my name before harrassing me. So towards the end of the night im avoiding the 2 guys (who, just for the record, were really really old) and im outside having a mad chat to "Boy" and then the bar closes so everyone has to leave. but unfortunately it is a rainy type of night so there are heaps of people on the street waiting for taxis. All my friends seem to have abandoned me (which seems to happen quite a bit..) and im all alone when all of a sudden the 2 creepy old men are back. and they are like, so you're going to come home with us tonight arent you? and im like, um, no im not.. and they are like, we dont hear the word no. and they have me like, PRESSED to the wall and i could not get away from them they had me cornered. so then i do the trusty old "i have a boyfriend" trick, which im beginning to notice does not work as well as you would think/hope. i mean, if i was a girl and trying to pick up a guy and he has been saying no all night and then he says "i have a girlfriend" i would back the fuck off. just saying.
  anyway, i say "no i cant go home with you. i dont want to and.. i have a boyfriend" and the 2 guys are like, no you dont.. and im like, uh, yeh! i do! and they are like, why havent we seen you with him all night then? if hes not here, it doesnt count.. (what the fuck? it still counts, you fuckers) and then "boy" walks out of the bar. And boy had been pretty friendly to me all night and told his friend who was trying to sleaze on me for part of the night to fuck off. and he had my arm around me at one point. so i look at boy and im like, "well, your wrong. theres my boyfriend, "boy" thats my boyfriend". and i guess "boy" saw the desperation in my eyes because he was by my side in a flash and had his arm around me and was like, "hey babe, i was just looking for you. ready to go?" and im like, practically ontop of him because im so gratefull and also because im so shocked about how quickly he caught on to what i was doing, because im guessing most guys would be like "what? boyfriend? me?" while your raising your eyebrows at them like, JUST PLAY ALONG! and FINALLY they catch on and go "oh yeh. hey.. girlfriend" (no offense any boys reading this, but your pretty dumb sometimes). and then "boy" is leading me away with a casual "see ya later fellas" to the creepers who were possibly about to rape me.
  YOU MIGHT THINK THE STORY IS OVER but its not. so then we walk to the servo with me being like, "oh my god thankyou so much those guys were such creepers" and him being like, "yeh no problem" and then im about to walk home and the 2 creepers are back and the are like, we know your faking. where'd your fake boyfriend go? and im all like, "im not faking" but then "boy" is not with me he is doing something with his friends. so im back to square one. and im like, no i definately have a boyfriend... "boy" come back. these guys dont believe me! and boy is by my side and is hugging me and is like, whats not to beleive. we love each other.
  it was amazing. its probably one of the sweetest things a guy has done for me ever.
  
• You are a pretty good kisser. Just putting it out there..
  for the readers (luke) there is no way that i didnt kiss him after he did that..
  
• That time that i ended up sleeping over, it was pretty cool how you hugged me all night. most guys just roll over and go to sleep.
  for the record, readers (luke) i did NOT have sex with him. we just made out in bed til we fell asleep. again i state, after the fake boyfriend thing, there is no way i didnt makeout with him. single sweetest thing a guy has done for me ever, remember?
  and, when i say most guys, im basing that on F, S, and M. and that guy i went home with when i was out with nicky but ALSO didnt sleep with.
  
• Because you said you liked my voice. no one says that. how you said "your voice is so little. it sounds kinda vulnerable so you just want to protect it.. but at the same time its like, massively appealing.. not that im into kiddies"
  anyway, thats prob the moment i decided i wanted to date you.
  
• Because you say im hot. alot. and im pretty into getting my ego stroked. its a good way to get into my heart.
  
• I'm not sure about this, but im pretty sure you asked me out on a date.. 5 months in advance. which is cute.
  
• You're pretty attractive. yeh. im that shallow.
  
• You're taller than me. not that its hard. but im just not interested if you are shorter than me. AND you have nice hugging arms. and i like that your arms fit all the way around me. i like that in a guy.
  
• You're trying to convince me to stay in Armidale. even tho its not going to happen.

Yeh. so keep up the good work. in 5 months we can do stuff.

Love

Ann-Marie.

What Happened This Halloween.

Dear Readers,
As you know, i am living in the country of America, which aside from having insanely fatty food is also known for celebrating Halloween for real. as in everyone puts up decorations and carves pumkins and goes trick or treating. not just celebrating it like, a few slutty girls get to go out in thier underwear while they go drinking, while everyone else gets halfassed costumes and gets massively drunk... however, that kind of happens in America too.
I was a bit worried about my halloween evening because the girls were not so into letting me in on the plans of the evening and i was not sure who i was welcome to go with. until the germans welcomed me with open arms. and gave me free vodka. they say it like, "wodka" which makes me laugh. i love accents. (they probably think its weird that i say it vodka and not wodka).
so starting off, i had bought a costume from a shop in nyc online and just had to go in to pick it up. so on saturday i checked my emails so i could print off the receipt and the address and got an email saying "oh we are SO SORRY but we accidently sold your costume". well not that exact statement. but you get the picture.
WHAT THE FUCK!! so its HALLOWEEN and i no longer have a costume. so then i had to run around like a fiend to pull together a semi-acceptable look.
to cut a long story short, i went as little red riding hood, and i thought i looked quite cute.
Then i went trick or treating with the kids and then i wandered around new york city.

Something QUITE unexpected has happened.